I am an adult fiction writer. My focus has always been on adult topics in sci-fi and fantasy, with story/character driven plots, and often graphic depictions of both violence and sex.
Life as a Teenage Vampire, on the other hand, is Young Adult, so I had to rethink my usual content when tackling this project. I wanted it to be the type of book that I could have picked up at my high school library when I was younger—i.e. sex can exist, but not graphically depicted.
This tale of vampires and high school life does deal with several themes that can be seen as adult. Death, sexuality, falling in love. But it also focuses on things that young teenagers face, like acceptance of self and moral decisions of right and wrong in a world that, frankly, isn’t black or white and never will be.
I think coming of age stories have to strike that balance between adult and young adult, because that’s the cusp the characters are on—that exact transition.
That said, I still found myself writing out scenes that are a little more explicitly racy. I never want to squelch my creativity or what comes to mind, and sometimes, while we might need to kill our darlings, that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t write a scene to begin with. Everything informs on the characters and develops subtext that can be important for the scenes we do keep.
Today I want to share with you something I never fully fleshed out because I knew I’d have to keep it out of the final book. Also, if you haven’t read the book yet, warning that there are some mild spoilers ahead.
After the main characters have their first intimate encounter, which is in the book but not gone into great detail, there is some time that passes where we can assume they do more as they are getting to know each other in this new way, especially being amorous teenagers.
The cut scene was a chance for them to express their desires in an open way that often only exists between friends—the characters being friends who are now being intimate gives them a rare opportunity to be honest from the start of their relationship in a way that I think is often missing for many adult couples.
I deemed it too far on the adult spectrum for a young adult audience, but now you get the chance to read it here:
“So what do you think about…when you think of me?” Emery asks.
“I’m curious. We could always do those things for real now, you know.”
That prompts Connor to think about it. “I want to suck you off.”
Emery blushes. “Not the other way around?”
“I think about that too, but in case you’ve forgotten, you have this unfortunate habit of letting your fangs out when you get excited.”
“Oh yeah. I’ll work on that.”
“I think of it both ways, but I kind of like the idea…tucked between your legs, getting you to pant and whimper and make all these sexy noises.” He climbs on top of Emery.
“Remember when you split your pants last year?”
“It was cute! The outline of your underwear peeking through, I just wanted to…” He trails. “I’ll admit, usually I fantasize about you being on top. Or actually sort of like this.” He rolls his hips. “You know…riding you. I really like that one. But that day, with your pants torn, I wanted to bend you over the hood of my car.”
They start rocking rhythmically.
“What is the dirtiest, most elaborate fantasy you’ve ever had of me?” Emery asks.
“Recent. Play practice. We’re backstage and you have your pants around your ankles. I crowd you into one of the doorways and slip my hand right down the front of your boxers, palming you until you’re hard. And you’re shocked, but you like it. You really like it. But you have to go back on stage, so we have to stop, and you have to calm down, only you can’t stop thinking about it all the rest of the way through practice. After, we both kind of hover, waiting for everyone else to leave, and then it’s just you and me and I’m supposed to lock up. You wait for me on that ratty couch. And you are just…so hard in your jeans, like you can’t believe how much you want it. And I know I have you at my mercy, and I freaking love it. So I push you back into the cushions, open your jeans, pull you out…and you make all the noises I’ve wanted to hear. But you stop me before you come. You kick your pants and shorts out of the way, lift your legs…and I take you right there on stage, on that ratty couch. Of course fantasies tend to leave out certain, uh…protocols and necessary items I know we’d need, but…still, super hot.”
“Super hot. How close are you?”
“Really, really close…”
“I think I can keep my fangs in check for really, really close.” Emery flips them, gets between Connor’s legs and starts to suck him off.
“Dude, I mean like really…really close.” Connor makes it a few more seconds and then jerks up into Emery’s mouth. “Sorry…”
“No, it’s weird but…it’s not like blood, but sort of feels similar?”
“Really? Because if you can feed from that, we are so changing up our weekly routine.”
Emery laughs. “I’ll ask Alec. You could help me a little now…”
“Hell yeah, I’m going to.” They swap again, and Connor gets right where he wanted to be in the first place.